Hello Boston!

To Boston, we go...with a bit of trepidation, a lot of uncertainty but so much more faith. So, so much! God has a plan for Apollo and we hope to have a better idea of that plan in the next several days. We woke up bright and early today after a fun-filled week at home. We were so fortunate to overcome our jetlag quickly so we really had some great days full of giggles, running (yes!), playing, and cuddling. Our little boy is crazy about his sisters and Magnus (for the most part, ha). We were able to have lots of water action in the backyard between a slip n slide, water balloons, the inflatable water slide, and a new pool. We wanted to be careful to keep Apollo healthy for Boston with as much fun as we could squeeze in. Mission accomplished! He experienced so many "firsts this week" and we really enjoyed having a front seat to see them all.

Since we've been home for a week, we've learned that our warrior LOVES Mickey Mouse shaped waffles, yogurt with a straw, sausage, and watermelon. He is quite picky so we are still trying to figure out what he will eat. He likes to have everything on his plate like his sisters but won't actually eat it. We now know he does not, and I repeat, does not, like pickles, tomatoes, strawberries, veggies, lunch meat, cheese, and big pieces of anything. Apollo is quite mischievous with his little brother and our house can easily fall apart in less than 37 seconds! He loves toys with wheels, dinosaurs, crafts, stickers, and anything Mickey Mouse. He enjoys playing outside as often as possible and especially loves to play with bubbles, dump trucks, chalk, tricycle and hitching a ride on one of our bikes. He thinks he strikes gold when he spots a dog, cat or bird and giggles with delight. He has picked up so much English, it's quite incredible so, of course, we think he's a genius! We know he has much more to say so we're anxious for him to keep growing his vocabulary. And he LOVES singing songs so we sing all day long.

Apollo is finding his sweet little spot in our family and has come to realize we will be beside him forever. When we say "home", a big smile spreads over his face. And when anyone leaves like Daddy or Anya, he wants to make sure they're coming back to him. Sometimes when I'm singing him to sleep at night, he says everyone's names over and over. I think he's pretty smitten with his crew. It may have taken 4 1/2 long years but God placed our son right where he belongs.

Now that we've found him, we will hold on tight. We will do whatever it takes to ensure he has the best chance in this wonderful world which brings us back to Boston and our expert team of the best of the best. Tomorrow is a very big day and as we further investigate what's going on in that teeny tiny body. We're counting on being Boston Strong again!

Professional Airport Homecoming Photos

We were so blessed to have Nikki from Purple Lemon Photography take pictures of our arrival home at the airport on Saturday! We are super happy with them and beyond thankful because she did this as a gift to us. They are priceless and captured all of the love, excitement, and relief to be reunited with the ones we love so dearly. She offers Red Thread sessions free of charge for adoptive families. How amazing is that?! Here is a link to the gallery and they are available to purchase.

http://www.purplelemonphotography.com/viewing/apollo-duff/

She also made a slide show on YouTube which can be found here.

https://youtu.be/Vwp8XV6RWDk

Here are some of our favorites!

Our Super Special Boy with a Super Special Body

I wasn't able to get a post up about our cardiology visit yesterday because it was such a long day at the hospital and we were able to watch Anya's softball game at night from the car. The whole family crashing into our beds immediately followed!

It was a very big day that had been anticipated since December when we started the adoption process. We were at the hospital for nearly 6 hours and Apollo fell asleep during his 2 hour ECHO (which normally takes 30-45 minutes)! Apollo's super special body had our team scratching their heads and staring at the test results and images in disbelief, not quite sure what they were seeing. Many of Apollo's severe diagnoses were confirmed, we added a new big diagnosis to the list, and a great deal is still to be discovered about his amazing, little heart and body. We need additional imaging in Boston next week to really get a full picture of how his heart tick-tocks along with his other organs and where they are located(!). I know multiple family and friends are in medicine or are parents to children with special needs reading this so I'll list what we know as of right now.

Apollo has a single ventricle heart where his right ventricle is nearly non-existent. We're thankful his left ventricle is large and has good functionality because that is the preferred ventricle by cardiologists because it pumps the blood out to the body where the right pumps it to the lungs. Because of this "unbalanced AV canal", he has a VSD and a ASD. A normal heart has a right and a left mitral valve but Apollo has one large central valve. He has pulmonary atresia which means he is missing his pulmonary valve. He has dextrocardia where his heart is pointed to the right side instead of the left and is also located on the right side of his body. And finally (until we learn more next week), he has heterotaxy which affects multiple organs including the heart. We discovered he has multiple spleens and we'll find out where his other organs are positioned and how well they're functioning soon. Heterotaxy can also be genetic so we will have testing performed down the road.

It sounds like a whole lot of scary (and it is!) but we were prepared to hear all of it. As a dear friend wrote me, "you weren't drawn to him because he was the picture of health, but because you were drawn to his soul, something indescribable." I couldn't have said it any better! So let's focus on the good news, shall we?! Apollo's heart has a good "squeeze" function, his aorta looks good with open flow, and he has minimal leakage to his body. Going forward, we will see if his pulmonary veins are big enough to sustain the Glenn procedure which is an open heart surgery to bypass some blood flow to the heart so as to not make it work as hard. Our local cardiologist is guessing his pulmonary veins aren't large enough yet so he would hopefully receive a larger shunt to increase the blood flow so his veins can grow. We are praying that Boston will be able to do some type of intervention next week instead of sending us home because his teeth are in such bad shape. Hopefully we will not have to fix them first since his heart is in critical shape. Our local cardiologist believes he will undergo some type of repair so we will see.

I will post from Boston but will be busy until then with five of the cutest kiddos around who are loving that they are all together! We're going to have as much fun as we can until we leave again so I'm off to the sprinkler! :)

Together At Last!

I cannot express the depth of our gratitude to our wonderful village. We've received so many messages and calls so I apologize if we don't get back to you all right away. We are overwhelmed in the very best way which is quite the flip from two weeks ago. I'm a pretty open book (so you know it's Dana writing now) and I apologize for not really writing like I did during our trip with Magnus. I'm so thankful that Mike wrote almost every night. To be completely honest, I was overwhelmed and worried once we got to our little boy. Adoption is HARD no matter what age your child is but there are even more challenges when the child is older. As an adoptive parent, you try to educate yourself, prepare mentally and emotionally, but nothing can completely prepare you until you are living your new reality. And our new reality was scary. The key word in that statement is WAS.

Apollo has done incredibly well for having his little life come crashing down in an instant. There is no way I could adapt like he has and I am in awe of him because of his resilience. Because his heart works so very hard as you can easily feel it beat right out of his tiny chest. Because he has a million dollar smile (which may need a million dollars in dental work!) that makes a crowd flash an even bigger smile back at him. Because he says "Wo Ai Ni" (I love you) over and over. Because he always looks for our approval and is proud to show off what he has created (which today was a dinosaur connected to a gigantic fire engine by way of a broom and string - don't ask!). Because he is smart as a whip - he's both creative and analytical. Because he loves when we sing (and we don't belong on the radio!). Because he giggles when we don't pronounce Mandarin correctly (uh oh, what are we saying?!). Because he has the cutest little scars on his right cheek that I stare at when he sleeps. Because he lets his mama sing him to sleep every night. And tonight, quickly drifted off peacefully without any self soothing behavior which means he is finding security and comfort with us. I pray he rocked and sung himself to sleep for the last time two weeks ago. It is my mission that he won't ever have to do it again. Ever.

Our Apollo is a priceless gift from God and we share in His love for our son and brother. As you can guess, the girls are smitten with him! No surprise that he already adores them too. Today has been filled with many giggles and some tears. Our baby Magnus is having a hard time with the adjustment but we saw so much of him return now that he is home with his adoring sisters. They picked up right where they left off in loving on him something fierce.

As much as we love China, we could not have wanted to come home any more. Not having the girls with us was excruciating and no amount of Facetiming was good enough. We feel whole again and so very hopeful of our wonderful future together. No matter how long that future may be. Thy will be done as we follow His will, not ours. We ask for your prayers as we head to our St. Louis cardiologist on Wednesday to find out what is truly going on in Apollo's perfect little body. We will send the results to our cardiology team in Boston and fly out the following Wednesday for more testing and possibly surgery. Are we scared? Yes. Do we have faith in the One who can move mountains? Yes. Is our son worth it? A million times, YES. This is "All for You, Apollo" and we are "Together At Last"!

Home is where the heart is!

We made it home!  After a 15 hour flight from Hong Kong to Chicago, a 4 hour layover, and then a quick hour flight to St. Louis, we safely arrived about 7:15pm.  We were greeted by a wonderful gathering of family and friends at the airport. Apollo was overcome with joy as he smiled and played with his new sisters, cousins, and friends. It was truly a joy to see a child that has been through so much disruption and confusion in just a few short weeks able to share his childhood love for life with everyone. We had a professional photographer and most people were taking pictures, but I wasn't. So, I don't have any to share tonight. As they trickle in, I will post them to the blog.

Overall, it was a long day, but the boys really handled it extremely well. They barely slept and had a few meltdowns (unfortunately one of Magnus's was right as we arrived in STL).  So glad to be home and begin our life together as the complete Duff Family of 7!!

 

 

 

 

 

Arrived in Hong Kong

Not much to report on this day. We pretty much just woke up in Guangzhou, had breakfast, finished packing, and the took a van down to Hong Kong. It was a 3 hour drive which actually went pretty well. Dana and I rated it a 7 or an 8. I bought some 19 RMB (less than $3) transformers at Walmart and that helped keep them busy. Apollo actually slept for about an hour.

 

Magnus fell asleep for the last 15 minutes and then woke up in beast mode!  

We are staying at the hotel that is closest to the airport. After checking in, I asked the front desk how often a shuttle runs to the airport. She looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language (pun intended). She said no shuttle, you walk. I was a bit caught off guard by the comment as I thought about the number of suitcases and children that we had. I said we can't walk with all of our things. She said, airport is through that door. When I went over and looked, sure enough, there was the terminal right next to the lobby of the hotel. I'm sure she thought I was an idiot. 

We walked over to the United terminal to try to sort out some confusion with our seats for the flight home. The app on my phone says that Apollo is sitting in the same row as us, but about 4 people in between us. I'm sure they wouldn't mind passing toys back and forth. Dana called and spoke with someone before we left home and they said it had been fixed. We weren't so sure because when we called a few days ago, the lady told Dana "I will put you all in row 13." Which made us think that it wasn't set up previously. The app on my phone never changed to row 13. So we just marched over to the terminal and spoke with one of the ticketing agents that got us all set up to sit together (ish). The plane is in a 3-3-3 format so we have an aisle between the seats. We will just have to make it work.

Please keep little Apollo in your prayers tomorrow as his little heart and lungs are put to a new test with the altitude and pressurized cabin. We have been lugging 9 massive lithium ion batteries through China in preparation for him needing oxygen throughout the entire 15 hour flight.  See you soon!

 

Our Request to All of You

I wanted to write to "prep" our family and friends who will be in contact with Ling Ling/Apollo upon his return home at the airport and around town (which won't happen too much). He is a precious, sweet, energetic (shocking, I know), generous, mischevious, considerate, busy, smart, curious, and loveable child of God. He is awesome but we need you to keep in the forefront of your mind that he has gone 4.5 years without parents and without familial rules. Due to his severe heart condition, we were told he really wasn't told "no". Can you imagine what would happen if a child was allowed to do pretty much anything they wanted for all of their toddler years? Many undesirable behaviors could and did form in that time and we are working hard to teach him what is right from wrong. He also must learn what it's like to be loved as a son and brother. Our days are not easy but they're worth it! This will likely take days, months, and even years. So please keep in mind that he doesn't know how to act like other children who have been raised by their families since birth. Please give him grace (and us too!). Our world has been rocked in the very best way and we have a long and difficult road ahead. A road that must be taken together.

We would also like to remind you that we need to teach Apollo that we are his mama and baba. This means we are the only adults who will provide for all of his needs. We must be the only ones to give him food, drinks, and affection. Please do not feed him, pick him up, hold him on the floor, kiss or hug him. Everyone did a great job respecting this request with Magnus and now he has an amazing attachment to us. It will likely be harder with Apollo because he will ask you more than Magnus. He's already tried to go to multiple other women here in China because that's what he's always done. So thank you in advance for your help because we are in a critical time of establishing our attachment and will be for quite awhile.

We would appreciate your prayers and understanding as we teach Apollo how great he is and how great he can be. We need both cheerleaders and prayer warriors; we know that we are surrounded by some of the best around!

Shamian Island - Part Deux and Liuhua Park Too

Not surprisingly, we are exhausted again so this post will be short and sweet. We headed back to Shamian Island this morning to pick up a few more souvenirs for the girls and to enjoy the beauty around us. We accomplished both goals and even captured a few cute pics which we have learned is nearly impossible with these wild boys! Back to the hotel for lunch and naps, then to meet our guide to visit Liuhua Park in the late afternoon. The boys enjoyed the rides and we enjoyed the musical entertainment. We finished our day with packing up our suitcases! We leave for Hong Kong at noon and it will be a 3 hour van ride from Guangzhou.

Just 2 more sleeps until we are headed HOME to our girls!!