Friday - Post Op Day 4

- 9am - Our little warrior is back! At 4:30am this morning, he had PT, meds, other 'housekeeping' and was taken off his oxygen!!! He is running around 96-99 oxygen saturation and I even saw it reach 100 and that is on his own, only room air!! And if that wasn't enough, his stunning smile came back!!! He was Skyping the girls and Grandma this morning and smiled and smiled. He even had a silent giggle in there. And while Mommy played stinky feet with him (one of his favorites), he let out a chuckle! When Daddy came in this morning, he was shocked and brought to tears at the sight of his son's smile. He's "there" in his eyes, not like yesterday where they were pretty glazed over. He is eating an egg and muffin - woohoo! The attending intensivist expects him to leave the ICU as well! Could things be going any better? Nope!! Thank you God for lovingly holding our son and his heart in your almighty hands. And thank you all for your unending support and prayers. Everyone here is stunned at Mags's progress!!

- 1pm - Big things are happening around here! Magsy went on a walk in the go-kart and saw Dr. Marx who couldn't get over his progress. He's expecting a shorter stay because our Magnus is magnificent or as a dear friend called him, Magnusificent! He also stood up for a bit but is too weak that he was back in my lap quickly. He is ready to leave the ICU but there are no beds on the cardiac floor . When one opens up, we'll transfer on over!

- 7pm - Mags had a relatively uneventful afternoon except for breaking free of his breathing stickers on his face. We're taking that to mean that the doctors don't expect him to need any more oxygen! He's holding steady at 98% O2 rate on his own - go Mags go!! His heart rhythm was normal all day yesterday but went back to "junctional" which means it's out of rhythm now. It's all ok and this doesn't mean he needs a pacemaker long term. It just takes awhile for the heart to recover. He had so many smiles earlier that I think he used them all up and has been very docile. He's getting lots of snuggles and movie time. Daddy leaves early in the morning so he will have to say goodbye. It's so beyond sad to see him go but I'll be sure to take care of his baby boy so when he sees him again, Magnus will run into his arms!

Thursday Updates - Post Op Day 3

-8am - First, I cannot express enough gratitude and praise to our Lord. Our baby is back and better than ever! As the nurse placed Magnus in my arms, I saw a glimpse of heaven. We waited so long to hold that sweet little body that it was beyond blissful! He is slowly showing his true colors, aka feistiness! His overnight nurse called him King Magnus the entire shift. We ate it up! The attending physician just came in to say that his lungs aren't collapsed but they are contracted so he won't be ready to move out of the CICU for a little while. His chest tube just began draining which it hadn't been doing all yesterday so he won't be able to get that out today either. This is all to be expected and he is still doing great! The girls got to see him last night for the first time in days. He was pretty agitated, saw them and completely calmed down. Oh how he loves his sisters!! He is sound asleep right now and I just ordered him his first meal in days. You may even get to see his beautiful face later today. :)

-11am - Rise and shine, look who wants to say hello to everyone! :)

Isn't he more handsome than ever?!

3:30 pm- Dr. Emani came in the room as Dana was holding Magnus in the chair. He jokingly looked at the bed and said, "where is my patient, where is Magnus?" It was a very sweet interaction as he was very positive about how he is progressing. Mr. Magnus made his first attempt to stand up a couple of minutes ago. Legs were a bit wobbly and he wasn't very happy about the idea so we cut it short. The nurse put in an order for a cart so we can wheel him around in a bit. Poor little thing gets tuckered out very quickly. He is doing so well though that they took his O2 down to 1/2 a liter. Might come off oxygen today!  

Just chillin in Boston!

- 7pm - Today was a super chill day with Mags sleeping away 90% of it. His nurses said it was to be expected for such a big surgery. He had to go back up to 1 liter of oxygen because his O2 sats declined. He also is a champion at filling his diaper so they will pull him off some of the diuretics. He had a couple of bites to eat throughout the day and is a big fan of apple juice. This is a marathon and not a sprint so he is going at a strong and steady pace. Right now, he's cuddled up with Daddy watching Princess Sophia. He'll watch anything! Let's hope he sleeps the night away since we're splitting our bedside vigil for him again!

Our Paths Crossed - The BEAUtiful Story of Two Sons

I realized that though many of you know the story of our adoption process and how we found our Magnus, there are probably many of you who haven't heard it. It's a pretty amazing story so I'm happy to share!

Early on in our dating years, Mike and I talked about adopting. We didn't know from what country but we thought having two biological children and adopting our third sounded like a great family plan. We lived a happy little life with our Anya and knew it was time to add to the Duff clan. What we didn't know was that God wanted us to exponentially grow and blessed us with our twins, Juliette and Eliza. The first thing I said after being told we were having twins at our doctor's office was "how are we going to adopt now?" We agreed to suspend the discussion for several years and just survive our crazy new lifestyle. And I mean "survive"!

In July 2014 after many discussions, we decided to start the adoption process in the next year. I researched like crazy, joined FB groups and listened to teleconferences and webinars. We chose Holt International as our agency and submitted our application on Easter Sunday, April 5, 2015. Our home study was delayed by three months but once we started, we flew through it (our social worker is amazing!).

After looking at all of the country programs throughout the world, we settled on South Korea, China and Bulgaria, in that order. New regulations had been passed in South Korea changing the process and different program elements so we turned to China. There are two paths to take with Chinese adoptions - the healthy child route which is about an 8 year wait right now and the special needs route which is usually 12-24 months. We felt strongly that we had the resources to help a special needs child, specifically a cardiac child. Just as we both had been called from God to adopt, we both realized that God was also calling us to a child with cardiac issues. Most people thought we were crazy but we knew with conviction that this is the path He was leading us to take.

So we decided to be matched by our agency which means they receive files of children and find a good match to what special needs, age range, gender fit your profile. As the months passed on and we worked hard on mounds and mounds of paperwork, I happened upon a blog post from a China adoptive mama. She is an advocate for finding children their forever families. I read her blog several times a week and this particular post stopped me in my tracks. She included a photo of a BEAUtiful baby boy who desperately needed heart surgery. He was not going to have it in China so there was an urgent need to get him to the US.

First pic of BEAUtiful Anthony

I went to his agency's web site to read more about him and two pictures away was our Magnus. He had a pink blanket behind his head and he was so gorgeous that I thought he was a girl. He actually took my breath away and I gasped out loud. As I looked at his temporary name, Forrest, I realized he was in fact a he and not a she.

First picture of our pretty-in-pink Magnus

I asked Mike if I could request both beautiful boys' files from the agency, WACAP. Surprisingly, he said yes and I called right away. We received both files the following day, September 5th, and we decided to open up Magnus's first. There was something about him that I was completely drawn to, like I already knew he was our son. Mike felt the same way. His diagnoses were super scary and much more complex than we initially thought we could handle. But it didn't matter. We cried many tears over Mags's file and decided he was ours and chose not to open the other BEAUtiful boy's file. We knew we would want him as our son as well and knew it wasn't possible to adopt two serious heart babies at once.

BEAUtiful Anthony

WACAP had named him Anthony and my heart broke for this gorgeous boy. As we had Magnus's file reviewed by multiple doctors, Anthony was always on my heart. I prayed time and time again for him and wondered if his family had found him. The doctors reviewing Magnus's medical files suggested that we needed to get him to the US quickly so we requested to expedite his adoption and switched agencies so now we were a WACAP family. Both US Immigration and the Chinese governing body over adoptions accepted our request and we were in China on January 5th...exactly 9 months from when we submitted our initial application and exactly 4 months from receiving Magnus's file. It all happened at warp speed!

Last pic of our sweet boy 

before we brought him home

You know the story of our Chinese journey from this blog so I'll pick up in April. Now you haven't forgotten about BEAUtiful Anthony, right?! A China heart mama posted a pic of her son, BEAU, asking for prayers for his surgery the following day. She posted an adorable picture of him and he looked familiar. I thought maybe he could be "Anthony" but I had never seen his face with a smile and this little one had a smile from ear to ear. I private messaged her to send our prayers and included a picture of Magnus so she saw our little heart warrior who would also have open heart surgery soon. She wrote back instantly saying, "I cannot believe this!" I was baffled as to what she was thinking. Through a flurry of messages back and forth, she told me that she knew Magnus from a year ago when he was listed with another agency. He had been listed with another agency after that so a total of 3 agencies. She and her godmother had prayed for him so often. She called WACAP in September to inquire about him. She was told he probably had a family but asked if she had seen "Anthony"? The rest is history and "Anthony's" family had finally found him! So BEAUtiful "Anthony" no more but BEAUtiful Beau! She said that she believed Magnus led her to Beau and that is exactly what we have said about Beau leading us to Magnus. Destiny!

Look what the love of a family does!

Beau had his surgery in April and recovered beautifully. Of course he did, it's in his name! We have remained in close contact and plan on meeting some day. I feel as if we are practically related and have such a strong bond to this wonderful woman. Her son was almost mine and my son was almost hers. It's like our sons are soul brothers! They couldn't be any cuter even if they tried!

I'm certain God put us on our paths, destined to cross, so that we may love each other and our sons!

Wednesday Updates - Post Op Day 2

7am - Little Warrior had a stable night and had his cooling blanket turned off again at 2:30am. This time, he's kept his body temp low! His blood pressure is still erratic but he's doing well. The intensivists just rounded and have plans to take him off his paralyzing medicine today. He is still junctional which means his heart isn't beating in rhythm yet so his pacemaker is doing most of the work. The nurses have been so good to him and he's even charmed them while sedated! They're enjoying the pics we have up of Mags and the girls and can't wait to see him awake. Mike went back to our patient house and got a full night of sleep and I was out cold in our room, only to wake up when any alarms would go off. We miss our buddy so terribly. He's here but he's not here. Soon enough, he'll be showing off his deep brown eyes and infamous screams...they'll see just how big of a fighter he can be! We can't wait!

Our fancy decorations

- 9:30am - they lifted Mags's paralytic and he started moving on his own!! It was quicker than they were expecting...such a rock star! He moves around to our touch and voices so he's knows we're here. It actually looked like he was dancing because his torso was moving rhythmically all around. They're even planning on removing his breathing tube and LA line (for those of you who are medical). He's moving in the right direction and we're doing a small happy dance!

- 12:30pm - Magsy Moo Moo is holding strong and keeping his temp and blood pressure steady. He opened his eyes several times but he wasn't really "there". They are planning to remove his LA line to his heart in an hour which needs to happen before extubation. Go baby go!

Some of the machines keeping him alive

- 2:30pm - the LA line was removed at 1:30pm and Mags had minimal bleeding so no transfusion was needed. The docs are talking about taking him off the breathing tube around 5pm and maybe his chest tube before that time. Such a big day for our little warrior!!

Heart pillow that all his nurses have started to sign!

- 5:00pm - This one was a big step forward!  At 5:00 Magnus was taken off his breathing tubes and is breathing fully on his own.  At the same time they switched off his external pacemaker to see how he would react.  It also went well and he is fully stable.  As I type, Dana is holding him in a chair.  He is obviously very groggy and still a bit out of it, but he is basically functioning fully on his own.  He just growled which means he's back to normal in our book.  What a difference a few hours make! 

Tuesday Updates - Post Op Day 1

- 7am - Per Magnus's nurse, "he had a great night!" I'm so glad she said so because we're hanging on every word that is being said. He continued to have a fever that is brought down with Tylenol. His white blood cell count is a bit high and he is on medication to keep his blood pressure down. He is also on a cooling blanket to bring his body temperature down so his heart doesn't have to work so hard. He is on a paralyzing med, and has a breathing and feeding tube in. He is still so beautiful and is all cuddled with his lovey, Peter the Panda Bear. :) We will continue to update throughout the day to each day's post.

Look, 100% O2 saturation!!

Read it carefully - a new heart & spirit! This was kept on all night for him. A sweet baptismal gift!

- 1pm - Mags is doing great. They tried turning off his cooling blanket but his temp rose too much so they turned it back on. He also just had an EKG to see if his heart is getting back into rhythm which it isn't yet. This is all as to be expected for such a big surgery.

Magnus's guardian angel and St. Michael are protecting our baby boy (both gifts -thank you!)

- 5pm - His nurse is turning off the cooling blanket to see if he can maintain a low temperature on his own. If he can stay low for several hours, they will try to take down his paralysis medication. Come on baby boy, fight! You are covered in our prayers!

These are handprints of 57 family and friends

- 9:15pm - Magsy Moo had to go back on the cooling blanket because his temp slowly crept up and his blood pressure was too low after being erratic for the last couple of hours. He is still doing great and is stable. Keep storming heaven with your sweet prayers for our warrior. He is going to battle!

Surgery Updates

Today is the day our son will no longer have a broken heart! We're filled with some nerves but much more faith. We will keep adding to this post throughout the day as we get updates. Magnus was happily playing with a musical toy as he was taken back to the OR. He was given another oral sedative and I didn't spill most of it this time as I did with his catherization. We are waiting to speak to his surgeon before he begins.

- 9:15am - incision has been made. Our baby's heart is in the most skilled hands.

- 10:30am - Magnus is on the heart and lung bypass machine.

- 12:05 pm - he is still on bypass and all is going well.

- 1:40pm - baby boy still on bypass and doing great.

- 3:10pm - our strong son is OFF BYPASS!!!! We are waiting for Dr. Emani to come speak with us! We will learn what he was able to repair.

- 3:30pm - Magnus had a beautiful, full bi-ventricular repair as planned!!! There were no surprises!! He currently has a pacemaker that is planned to be removed in a couple of days. The next 24-48 hours are critical so please continue to pray for him. Thank you all for your overwhelming support throughout the day. We are so thankful for each and every one of you!!

- 5:20pm - we will get to see Magnus in the CICU in 5 more minutes (i.e., eternity!).

- 6:00 pm - we are back in the CICU in his room. He looks great, his oxygen saturation is at 100% and his toes are PINK!!!! I didn't realize how blue they were until I see their new color! Our God is good! Now, round two of his fight begins!

- 9:00 pm - Mags has a nurse full time at his bedside. She is excellent! She is continuously working to keep him stable because he has a fever (which is common after such a big surgery) and his blood pressure is fluctuating  (also common). He is fully sedated but opened his eyes once when I first started talking to him and then again about 15 minutes ago. His nurse increased his sedative because he's not supposed to do that. Oh, he is a fighter!! We will start a new post of updates tomorrow. With all of our hearts, thank you for your prayers and love!

Boston Tea Party

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms that are reading our blog.  We are so lucky to have been blessed with two great mothers who have given and continue to give us so much. One of the reasons this trip to Boston was even possible was because we knew that our girls would be well taken care of by their Grammy and Grandma.

Thank you both so much. We Love You! Here are a few pictures that we received throughout the day of our girls back home having fun at the Magic House and out for dinner.

Clearly this was not the typical Mother's Day morning for us. Usually the girls and I will bring breakfast to Dana in bed and give her a few presents. One of my traditions each year is to write a poem from each of our children to Dana.  Because this blog is primarily about Magnus, I will go ahead and post the poem that I wrote to her from Magnus. Hopefully this picture is clear enough to read.

We got a late start to the day today. Well, it was actually a very early start as Magnus woke up at 4am, ready to have a Boston Tea Party. We couldn't get him back to sleep until about 6am. We didn't get out of bed completely until around 9am. Rough start!

Once we showered up and stopped for some Dunkin Donuts, we were off to church. We were going to take the train into the city and see if we could catch a service in a really cool old church. We were struggling to find one that had a noon mass. Dana remembered the basillica that she visited a few days ago had a noon mass so we headed that way...in the rain.  We got there very early and found out that the next English mass was at 12:30pm, but there was a Spanish mass already in progress. Well "alabado sea el Señor", it was a glorious service. The music and community were glorious. At the sign of peace, everyone left their pews and embraced each other as if they were all family. It went on for about 5 minutes. I think that is the way it should always happen!  At the end of mass the priest called a large group of people to the front. We figured it was for a blessing, so we headed up ourselves. It wasn't until we were in the full mix that I realized all the men were still in the pews. Oh, a Mother's Day blessing, that makes sense! I kind of slid off to the side all cool-like as if I just wanted to get up closer for a better look. Dana got her bendición (blessing) and a red rose.

When mass ended it was still pouring down rain. We decided that it would make more sense to get Mags to take a nap and then we would try to go see something else in the afternoon. When he woke up, the sun was shining for the first time since Dana has been here. We headed to the train to go see Boston Harbor. 

The harbor/wharf area was really bustling and a lot of fun. We walked around, did some souvenir shopping, ate some delicious food, and Mags even got a ride on a carousel.

While we have been having a good time, we do know why we are here. Our little guy that breaks into a full-out sweat when he gets even the slightest bit upset and gets out of breath just putting on his pajamas needs some fixin'.  That unique sound of whooshing when we put our ear to his chest will be replaced with a more familiar thump-thump, thump-thump. Tomorrow will probably be one of longest days of our lives. Our little bundle of joy will be in the hands of the best doctors in the world, but more importantly, in God's hands. We are confident that what the lady told Magnus in the airport on our way home from China (God has big plans for you little one!) is so true. 

Thank you all for the support and prayers. We will try to make short posts throughout the day tomorrow to keep everyone updated as we hear from his medical team.

From Dana:

"A child born to another woman calls me Mama. The depth of the tragedy and magnitude of the privilege are not lost on me." - Jody Landers

Magnus's biological mother has been on my mind all throughout this special Mother's Day. It's her day as much as it is mine. I would give anything to tell her about our incredible son. Yes ours, Magnus is both hers and mine. We are connected by a very special bond. I wish we could share in this bond together but that will never happen. If I had the chance, I would tell her that she has the most beautiful son who makes strangers smile time and time again. That our son is so full of joy and love for life. He bobs his head and dances to silent music as he toddles on the sidewalk. That our son is so loving and so loved. He showers us with exhorbitant amounts of affection, it must be inherent from her. And we couldn't love him any more, not one more bit! He is smart - not just smart, crazy smart! And he is fierce. So fierce and brave. She would beam with pride as I do. I pray her heart and mind have peace and somehow know that he is alive, he is adored and he will be healthy soon! I am forever grateful to this selfless and brave woman. She has changed my life like no other and I will always love her for the gift of our son.